Wedding vows and spotty faces 08/24/2009

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Today, I feel like Zeus is shadowing me. I'm in a super bad mood brought on by a few sleepless nights and an absolute lack of energy. I feel like I haven't stopped moving for 6 months and desperately need a break. For those of you that didn't know, I had Eclampsia shortly after my son was born, ended up in ICU for 4 days after 2 massive seizures.  The day I was released, my husband fell very ill and seems to have remained that way ever since. At first, it was his stomach. Currently, his back has been out for 3 months and although I sympathize greatly with his painful plight I now look like a withered balloon stuck in a power line as all domestic jobs have been left to me. I know the wedding vows clearly state "in sickness and in health" but I think it should be reworded: "In sickness and in health with a maximum of 1 month bed rest then you're on your own again"...I do!

 What has this all got to do with my dieting? Well... EVERYTHING. If  I'm not getting my arse to a gym it's because I'm running around after 3 kids who are still on summer holidays after 2 months off! If I'm not eating right it's because I simply can't be bothered under the circumstances. If I'm feeling a little low it's because I need a change of scenery. This hot California sun is pissing me off as I've got nothing to wear and it's messing up the Ph balance of my now very spotty face. Clearasil doesn't seem  to help much and shopping has been postponed until I can actual fit into one of those tiny changing room cubicles.

 

The Power of Negative Thinking 08/17/2009

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When I was younger, I used "The power of negative thinking" technique quite often. Here's how you do it...Let's say you have an exam to pass or a job interview you need to nail or a man you wish to shag, you basically use the negative approach and firmly persuade yourself that you won't pass, you won't land the job and definitely won't be having sex anytime soon. This way, if these weren't to happen, you're not disappointed as you have already convinced yourself that it wasn't meant to be anyway. If, on the other hand, you do finally pass that wretched math test, or land that dream job or finally get to have an orgasm with someone other than yourself, it's an unexpected pleasure. I will now take this old approach into my dieting. Instead of wishing to fit into a purple pair of hot pants and roller blade down Venice beach by this time next year, I will aim to remain exactly the same, enjoy who I am regardless and if a few pounds are lost along the way, great!

Eat my shorts Tony Robbins!  I charge $50 a session. Come see me for some good old negative thinking anytime, it really does work.

 

The Power of the scales and hypothermia 08/16/2009

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The scales have moved...I repeat the scales have moved. Not much, but enough to make me feel like my efforts are paying off. I have also graduated from my pregnancy jeans into a regular pair with buttons....Big round of applause. Today, life is good. It's funny how important dropping a pound or so on the scales can make you feel.  I know people tell you not to look at them but you have to measure your success somehow and scales just happen to proclaim the gospel truth when dieting.

California's summer sun has also surely helped here as I find myself sweating profusely on a daily basis. I feel I have a natural wrap around me at all times as my hair has grown so thick and long that it's become a vital part of my shedding. I'm hoping my double chin will disappear with the constant heat that radiates around my neck area.

 I still have a long way to go and must confess to getting a bit blue now and again as it really isn't that easy. Occasionally when I look at myself, I see my youth fading fast but I guess I need to start accepting this new me  - flabby belly, 3 kids and all. I have a lot to be grateful for and a lot to keep me positive.  Sometimes, the seasons change so softly one can hardly notice when autumn ends and winter begins and other times the seasons change so dramatically you need to quickly go out and buy your thermals so not to get hypothermia, you need to catch up. That is where I am at right now, I'm catching up.

 

Salsa. Russians with bad breath and Jimmy Choo shoes 08/03/2009

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I have found a good way to strengthen my calves. Salsa.  I actually managed to drag my husband, his brother and my sister in law to a Friday night salsa class that promises to teach you a move that you can later show off at the Salsa party that follows after downing a cheap glass of wine - All this for $20!. This particular dance studio also offers pole dancing lessons which I might consider further on down the road when I can actually effortlessly lift my own body weight,  do the splits and smile all at the same time.

Anyway, These types of lesson/dance off gatherings always bring together a weird bunch of people. I would say that most of them are single and must go there to a: meet someone b: get dressed up c: better their dancing skills d: get away from their mother for the night.  Although we enjoyed ourselves, my family and I approached it all lightly; laughing and giggling at our mistakes seeing the silly side to it all yet the rest of the class were kind of grave and took it  very seriously. We rotated partners as there weren't enough girls to men and at one point I was paired up with a very stern looking Russia with bad breath who told me off when I made a wrong move - "No! I lead" were his exact smelly words. Cheeky bastard as if I went there to dance with him anyway. The woman paired up with my brother in law shouted to the teacher " Can you come and show this guy what to do because he doesn't know what he is doing" - An interesting bunch that made the evening that much more enjoyable.

It was actually a very good work out. I did notice that I was the only one sweating even amongst the men but I put it down to the tent like top I was wearing to cover my curves. One day I will wear a spandex hot pink leotard dance dress with 10 inch Jimmy Choos but for now I will settle with my flat comfortable loafers, my Coleman tent top and keep lighting up the dance floor with a smile!